Amanda White Photography: 2016

So it's been a while since I wrote a blog, or really shared much of anything other than pictures. Words are tough because you never know how things will be perceived, if you're saying too much, too little, or if anyone even cares to read what you have to say. Also there are so many voices out there today, most of which are not voices we should actually listen to. My hope is that my words can help people understand just a little about our journey, and the whole journey of adoption.

Adoption. Such a simple word means so much, but it can have meanings to different people. Over the past few months I've sort of created my own definition. To me adoption is...

A story that starts with great pain, and along the way through struggle, prayer, grace, forgiveness, love and most of all a lot of Jesus, moves towards healing.

As many of you know Josh and I are in the middle of our adoption journey. This journey has been a tough one for us. We have been waiting for over a year now. If you are human you know waiting is hard. Extremely hard. Heartbreaking. Excruciating. Exhausting. When I reflect on my life I realized that I have never really had to "wait" for much of anything in my life. Yeah the normal things, wait to graduate, wait to get married, wait to go on a vacation. But, I have never had to wait for something I have desired so greatly as being a mom, through adoption. For the past year I have looked at this wait as bad as if something was wrong with us, or God didn't want us to have a baby. Today, as I was on my face before the Lord, he reminded me (well slapped me in the face actually) that this wait is not a bad thing. That he has not forgotten us. That his plans are still to prosper us. But that's the thing, they are HIS plans. They are better than ours. He knows what our family will look like, he knows what is best for us, and even more he knows what's best for His kingdom and His glory.

Now I will be honest, this is not my mindset daily, even hourly. Most days I am sad, anxious, and frustrated. Anyone that says this process is easy is lying.

So if you're a praying person and wondering how you can pray for us, or anyone that's adopting for that matter here's how. Pray for peace, pray for patience, AN UNENDING AMOUNT OF PATIENCE, pray for them to trust, even on hard days. And pray for them to give themselves a lot of grace when they do doubt.

Alright so here is the "update" on our journey. Not much has changed since we became approved a little over a year ago. We have had some situations that could have been, but were not in the plan the Lord has for us. So our update is we are waiting. We don't know who our child will be or when they will become a part of our family, but we do know that it will be in His timing, and it will be good. Hard, but good. :)

Neither one of us know what our story will be, but we do know that He has not forgotten us, or our story. No matter how long we wait, or how hard this is He hasn't forgotten.

I love music, its how I connect most with The Lord, and this song "Sovereign Over Us" has really been my anthem. It has been a sweet reminder that he has not forgotten us, and he is with us all the way.

Your plans are still to prosper
You have not forgotten us
You're with us in the fire and the flood
You're faithful forever
Perfect in love
You are sovereign over us

Blessings,
-Amanda